Inspirational considered the week:
So that is me swallowing my satisfaction
Standing in entrance of you, saying, “I’m sorry for that evening”
And I am going again to December on a regular basis
It seems freedom ain’t nothing however lacking you
Wishing I’d realized what I had while you had been mine
I’d return to December, flip round and make it alright
I am going again to December on a regular basis
— Taylor Swift, “Back to December”
Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, positioned behind the enormous industrial followers used to chill the huge warehouse of pc servers that retailer Pete Thamel’s contact record, we come as soon as once more to Championship Weekend, which implies it is time for us on the Bottom 10 to make like the top coach of a school soccer workforce named the Owls and get the hell out of city.
But earlier than we commenced with our annual Scotch-Irish exit out the facet door that units off the hearth alarm, we assembled our Bottom 10 Selection Committee to assist type out the ultimate rankings. When we shouted into the air “Bottom 10, assemble!” we had been instantly joined by our traditional record of longtime esteemed colleagues that features me, my dad, Captain Morgan (aka my stepdad), former LSU coach Ed Orgeron, present Northwest Oklahoma defensive coordinator Jerry Glanville and Ed “Straight Arrow” Gennero, the person who joined forces with Sinbad and Supervisory Special Agent Dwayne Cassius Pride to avoid wasting the Texas State Armadillos from the demise penalty.
Bo Pelini served on the committee one 12 months in the past however by no means confirmed up this time round, so we changed him with Mack Brown, who instantly tried to solid 5 votes for North Carolina. For the second consecutive season, we additionally invited Jimbo Fisher however had been advised that he was too busy racing Rich Rod and Anthony Becht in kayaks up the Monongahela River towards Morgantown.
As per traditional, we had been advised by the luxurious Gaylord Texan, the place the hoity-toity College Football Playoff individuals hang around, that there was no room on the inn. So we hotwired an RV from a close-by Buc-ee’s and parked it behind an deserted Dickey’s BBQ adjoining to the Gaylord, so shut that it allowed Coach O to annoy Mike Riley and Gary Pinkel by aiming a laser pointer at them by the convention room blinds.
One extra sleep till the ultimate #Bottom10 rankings of 2024. It’s crowded in right here, however the Bottom 10 Selection Committee is used to cramped quarters…and potpourri spray. pic.twitter.com/0TD6NaTpVU
— Ryan McGee (@ESPNMcGee) December 3, 2024
And as soon as once more we leaned on our Bottom 10 FPI formulation. No, not the ESPN Football Power Index, however quite the Faux Pas Index.
Because everybody loves math, here is the way it works. Teams obtain one level for every win, minus one level for every loss, minus one level for every lack of their longest dropping streak of the 12 months, plus a minus-10 bonus if that longest dropping streak is at present lively. We additionally subtract the variety of factors they’ve surrendered on the season from the variety of factors they scored, subtract or add factors primarily based on their season turnover margin and subtract their weak spot of schedule (WoS) rating. If a workforce fired its head coach, that earned a 50-point subtraction, aka the Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus.
Divide all of that by the variety of video games performed, and there is your Bottom 10 FPI rating. See? Simple as pie. A Shaker lemon cherry rhubarb strawberry walnut pecan quiche with lattice crust and cranberry-pear cookie crumble topping.
So, with apologies to Tulsa lineman Ender Aguilar, former Toledo Rocket Alex Enders, former Wisconsin kicker Andrew Endicott and Steve Harvey, listed here are the season-ending Bottom 10 rankings for 2024.
Wins: +0
Losses: -12
Longest dropping streak: -12 (present -10)
Point differential: -362 (167 for, 529 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -9
WoS: -46
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: N/A
Total: -451
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -37.58
Nick Saban’s alma mater efficiently defended its 2023 Bottom 10 title by ending the season because the nation’s solely 12-loss workforce. Saban additionally misplaced 12 video games … over his final 9 years at Alabama.
Wins: +1
Losses: -11
Longest dropping streak: -19 (present -10)
Point differential: -202 (117 for, 319 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -19
WoS: -110
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: -50
Total: -420
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -35
The Molden Eagles almost swooped in for the Bottom 10 upset as Kent’s season completed early with some midweek #MACtion and Southern Miss performed yet another recreation, a tenth straight loss, the nation’s third-longest lively dropping streak. They did so by surrendering 21 factors in lower than two minutes to season-long Bottom 10 Wait Lister Troy Bolton State. The dangerous information is all the above. The excellent news is that Brett Favre has already filed the paperwork to see if the season qualifies for catastrophe aid so he can use the funds to purchase the workforce the gold-plated non-public aircraft used within the film “Richie Rich.”
Wins: +3
Losses: -9
Longest dropping streak: -4 (present -10)
Point differential: -210 (300 for, 510 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -7
WoS: -133
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: -50
Total: -420
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -35
In different gold-covered pure catastrophe information, the Golden Hurricane did not simply lose their final 4 video games, they misplaced them by surrendering 59, 38, 63 and 63 factors, together with three video games in opposition to EC-Yew, You A Bee? and FA(not I)U, all of whom spent giant chunks of time within the Bottom 10 this season.
Wins: +1
Losses: -11
Longest dropping streak: -11 (present -10)
Point differential: -290 (189 for, 479 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -14
WoS: -6
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: -50
Total: -391
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -32.58
The Buttermakers churn into winter driving the nation’s second-longest dropping streak, their solely 2024 win coming in Week 1 in opposition to the Indiana State Sycamores. In their protection, they did play the nation’s sixth-toughest schedule, in accordance with our ESPN Analytics Ouija board of reality. Also of their protection, Sycamores are powerful to cut down, so that they had been fairly drained.
Ryan Day is 66-10 at Ohio State, however 1-4 in opposition to Michigan. On the flip facet, Jim Harbaugh at Michigan was 0-5 in opposition to Ohio State earlier than profitable his final three. On the flip facet of that, Harbaugh additionally had that man named after a bunch of horses stealing indicators for him. On the flip facet of that, I’ve tried to look at that Netflix documentary about that man like 5 instances however maintain turning it off as a result of I can not see that sign-stealing man because the kind of sympathetic genius that he needs me to. On the flip facet of that, Ohio State followers are having a tough time seeing Day as a sympathetic genius, both.
Wins: +2
Losses: -10
Longest dropping streak: -6
Point differential: -176 (198 for, 374 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -6
WoS: -132
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: -50
Total: -378
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -31.5
Who outlasted all Owl-based FBS packages this season? Kennesaw, that is who. That’s who additionally beat out the Rice Owls, FA(not)U Owls and Temple of Doom Owls, all of who-m fired their head owls this season. But who fired their coach, who then confirmed as much as hoot it together with his former pigskin parliament the subsequent weekend anyway? These Owls, that is who.
Wins: +3
Losses: -9
Longest dropping streak: -5
Point differential: -176 (259 for, 435 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -13
WoS: -108
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: N/A
Total: -308
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -25.67
The Other Aggies had climbed out of the Bottom 10 like Bruce Wayne from that deep-hole jail in that film the place nobody might perceive what the dangerous man was saying and gave the impression to be within the clear after outdueling fellow CUSA scrambler Muddled Tennessee State two weekends in the past. But then they dropped the season’s closing Pillow Fight of the Week, actually, with two fumbles that had been returned for 2 UTEPid touchdowns. It was a finale combat nearly as badly choreographed as that very same film’s finale combat between Batman and Bane.
Wins: +2
Losses: -10
Longest dropping streak: -4 (present -10)
Point differential: -156 (270 for, 426 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -1
WoS: -74
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: -50
Total: -303
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -25.25
The Minuet-men employed the identical battle ways they employed at Bunker Hill, ready till they noticed the whites of their enemies’ eyes. Unfortunately, in soccer meaning you’ve got already been run over.
Wins: +2
Losses: -10
Longest dropping streak: -6
Point differential: -151 (185 for, 336 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -16
WoS: -11
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: N/A
Total: -192
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -16
The Semi-No’s spent their whole offseason in court docket desperately making an attempt to show they’d no enterprise taking part in soccer within the ACC. Then they spent the whole season proving past a shadow of doubt that, no, they actually did not.
Wins: +3
Losses: -9
Longest dropping streak: -9 (present -10)
Point differential: -101 (326 for, 427 in opposition to)
Turnover margin: -8
WoS: -35
Randy Edsall Fired Coach Bonus: N/A
Total: -169
Games performed: 12
Final Bottom 10 Faux Pas Index: -14.08
Back in July, the Fightin’ Gundys had been picked by many to be spending this weekend taking part in within the Big 12 championship recreation. Instead, they went 0-9 within the convention and ended the season with the nation’s fourth-longest dropping streak. It’s sufficient to make somebody declare that they’re a person and they’re 40, even after a season like this one, once they seemed 90.
Waiting record: Miss Sus Hippie State, FI(not A)U, FA(not I)U, Temple of Doom, Baller State, Georgia State Not Southern, Why OMG?, UTEPid, Muddled Tennessee State, treating flag planting like a TikTok pattern.
